You know that old saying about the only certainties in life being death and taxes?
Respectfully, I would like to add another one to that list.
Feedback.
More specifically:
a) that leaders and managers will always need to give it to their team members and
b) that leaders and managers will always need to practice and improve on how they do so.
Which is why I’m delighted to offer you this blog, the star feature of this week’s theme in Workology Co’s A-Z of Workplace Culture.
Before I share my tricks for making feedback delivery easier, I need to make something crystal clear.
For the sake of this blog, I will be assuming you already acknowledge feedback is mandatory
Sure, I get it. It is not in the top 5 of the favourite parts of your role.
That does not change the fact you know and accept it is important.
If on the other hand, you are sceptical of the need to provide feedback to your team, then I’ve got to be honest and declare I’m dubious as to the how/why you are in a leadership role. I would love to insert some humour here to lighten the mood, but this is too important a point for even me to thrown in some (attempted) comedic relief.
Instead, let us dive right into my tips and tricks.
Ali’s top 10 tricks for giving feedback
Drum roll please, as here are my Top Ten Tips for giving feedback:
- Provide regular and consistent feedback.
Sprinkle that stuff around like cheese on top of a pizza. There can never be too much cheese (even vegans eat special vegan cheese).
- Positive feedback is as important as developmental
Everyone likes to be praised for doing a good job. EVERYONE. Some people just prefer the quieter words of thanks from their manager (hello introverts, I see you there); others like their hard work to be shouted from the rooftops. Or to win employee of the month. Or to be mentioned in the newsletter. You should know your team well enough to understand who falls into which basket.
- Embrace the mantra
Before you even think about giving someone feedback, repeat after me ‘Feedback is given to help, not hinder or destroy’. Maybe craft yourself a nifty little Canva piece and hang the mantra on your office wall where you see it every day. Because if your motive for giving this feedback isn’t to somehow help your team member, you are reading the wrong blog.
- Be prepared to listen.
There are many, many reasons why employees underperform. You might think you know the reason why Fred’s numbers have gone from stellar to the cellar, but until you have an actual conversation with Mr. Flintstone, and LISTEN to what he says, you don’t actually know WHY. And you might be shocked when you hear the WHY.
- Sooner rather than later.
Do not let the issue fester. It is like a virus unchecked – it will mutate and multiply and spread faster than you can say COVID. Deal with it before it spreads to the wider team or has consequences beyond your team.
- Be professional and respectful when delivering the message.
Unless they have already checked out of the role, no one feels comfortable hearing they are not doing a great job or that their behaviour sucks. It is unpleasant to hear this from a manager.
Be objective not judgemental when planning specific examples (point 7). Do not deliver feedback like AWAY CEO Steph Kovey. Maybe imagine one of your friends or loved ones receiving feedback. What would you like them to hear?
- Be specific, clear, and constructive
Make sure you have specific examples of poor performance. Concentrate on the impact it has on others in the team rather than attacking the individual personally.
Another useful tool is the Seven Steps of Feedback, which looks like this:
- Work on developing the feedback muscle.
As with any muscle, consistent work pays off. Start easy i.e. ‘walk and talk’ conversations, build to ‘coffee and catchups’. As you grown in confidence, so will your ability to deliver feedback. Bonus result: you build more trust with your team members.
- Prioritise the feedback.
If you have more than 5 issues to give feedback about in one conversation, bah bung. You have waited too long, that is too much to address in one sitting. Deal with the top 5. When they are dealt with, come back to the list, and see if those other items really need to be pursued. I’m guessing not – because otherwise you would have dealt with them long before now.
- Choose when and where you are going to give the feedback.
I should not have to say this – but don’t deliver feedback, especially negative feedback, in the middle of the staff lunchroom or the café downstairs when other team members are present. Do not schedule a meeting to give developmental feedback an hour before a crucial deadline. And try to avoid holding the meeting in glass fishbowls where everyone can see what is happening in the meeting.
Receiving feedback
Whenever I see articles or blog posts about feedback, they usually concentrate on the how to give it part of the equation. And for good reason – see above. However it is also important to practice how we receive feedback.
Think back to the last time you received feedback, particularly of the less than flattering kind. How did it make you feel? I would be willing to bet my Bruce Springsteen Box Set on the fact that for most of us, our first response would be a defensive one.
Feedback is a bit like Brussel sprouts…
Because of the way negative feedback can make us feel, we often overlook the fact that receiving feedback is actually an important component of growth, both on a professional and a personal level. Something like Brussel sprouts. We may not like the taste (do you know anyone who does?), so we ignore the fact they are really, really good for us.
However we need to learn more about ourselves, so we can continue to grow and become the best version of ourselves. The Johari Model shows this nicely:
When we receive feedback, we learn ‘things they know’ which are in our blind spot, and bada bing, bada boom, we are gifted insight.
Fabulous, you understand feedback is crucial to self-growth. But how can you improve hearing it?
Tips for improving how to receive feedback
Yes, receiving feedback can be all kinds of awkward. Though with practice, and by following these basic tips, you can look forward to reaching a place where you enjoy receiving feedback.
I cannot guarantee you will ever be in that place with respect to Brussel Sprouts.
Bonus tip: If you have been gifted with positive feedback along the lines of the “you were brilliant” kind, please breathe and then accept the compliment with grace. You deserve it, or it would not have been given to you.
Some final takeaways
Exercising your feedback muscle is like using any other muscle. The first few times you try and flex it, it is likely to be difficult or cause you some pain. But adopt a Nike approach and Just Do It. And the benefits will outweigh any pain.
If you have leaders and managers who fall into the categories above (need to give feedback, and need to improve on the how), then you’ve come to the right spot. Feedback is our jam; so reach out, and let’s just do it.